Sincere Apologies

First attempt at this entry: Okay it has been a horrendously long time since my last entry and I apologise sincerely, semester is drawing to an end and I have actually been doing uni work! Although what I’m about to outline in this entry probably suggest otherwise……

Second: It’s currently 1am, exams are over so I should be able to get going on this entry. Apologies for the extreme lateness

Third: I’m currently on a bus from Washington DC to Philly, and I thought what better time to continue writing my blog seeing as I have nothing better to do whilst sitting on a bus.

Fourth, Fifth, Sixth . . . . . . . endless starts, here we go..

Just a warning – this entry probably isn’t as funny or entertaining as the last ones - because I have no more braincells left - it is more just a reminder of the good times we had so if you can’t be bothered reading, then basically:

·      I went to Vegas for a weekend with Nick Cheadle and his extremely generous dad, Chris whom I haven’t seen in four or so years, stayed in the Bellagio – It was unreal

·      The Penrith boys and I road tripped to Panama City Beach (PCB - Florida) for Spring Break – It was a challenge to say the least, but a time we will never forget – hoping to hit it up again next year.

·      I went with some American friends to Carolina Cup (big horse races and piss up) – It was great fun

·      The Penrith boys and I road tripped to Nashville (where I caught up with my great friend Keri whom I lived with in my 2^nd year of college) and Atlanta (where we hit up 6 Flags theme park!) for Easter long weekend – An unforgettable Easter break
·      I left Wilmington to start my road tripping around the states - mixed emotions!

Vegas

On the 2^nd of March I boarded a plane to spend the weekend in Vegas (as you do) to meet up with my great mate Nick Cheadle, and his Dad (who lives/works in California). After my 8 or so hours of flight time, including what I thought was a 5 year old shit of a kid kicking the back of my seat – who actually turned out to be celebrating her 21^st, and being asked if my accent was French (!?!?), I could see the lights of sin city - I had arrived in Vegas. I stepped foot into the terminal and was greeted with rows of pokies – this was going to be a gooood weekend. I jumped in a cab “To the Bellagio please Sir”. Yep, stayed in the Bellagio, thanks to a very generous Chris Cheadle! I arrived at the incredible Hotel and waited for Nick (who I had seen just before I left Aus) and Chris (who I hadn’t seen in 4 or so years!) – our room was on the 26^th floor, room 26094 – there were a lot of rooms!

View from the front of the Hotel

We didn't spend anytime messing around and headed to the most impressive buffet I have seen in my life (still in the hotel) - roast lamb, lamb chops, roast beef, roast beef with rosemary, beef wellington, roast pork, prawns, oysters, crab, fish, 20 different desserts and so much more. Chris had to do some work so Nick and I hit the town. Within the first 100m of walking out of the hotel we were offered coke twice – reality hit, we were in sin city, USA!

We walked down the main strip for about half an hour just soaking it all up, before deciding to head into a casino – mainly because we were sick of all the Mexicans flicking business cards in our face for strip joints and prostitutes. Including 60 year old women wearing hoodies saying “GIRLS! GIRLS! GIRLS! Call this number”. We walked in, sat down at a $10 blackjack table, and before we knew it we’d lost $100 each in about 5 minutes – so much for beginners luck. We then realised we were at a casino that didn’t give free drinks, so we headed back up the strip toward the higher end and sat down at some pokies betting small amounts but getting free drinks! I ended up winning on a couple of pokies and was probably only down $20-$40 by the end of the night.

The next day Cheads and I did a bit more exploring, shopping and got a couple of tats.

And the wolfpack had grown

We then headed back to the Hotel to have lunch with Chris, where we started on the beers. The three of us then headed out and about to explore some more. We found a place selling Eiffel Towers full of alcohol – what a great idea.

My bloody phone ran out of memory just as I went up for my go

Headed back to Bellagio to hit up the blackjack tables where we came across the best dealer ever, a black guy named Jarso, who told us when to hit or stay – majority of the time he was right – I still lost some, but I blame that on Winnie, the Asian bird who was sharing the shift on that table. But all in all we had a good 3 or more hours at the tables and I was only about $60 down – Plus, free drinks the whole time, so I regard that as a win.

Cheads and I then headed out to check out some clubs. We saw an awesome club the previous night which we went to go back to, but guest list only which was shit. We walked the streets some more and got convinced by some bloke to go to his club so we did, and it turned out alright, and was actually (girls this is for you) where Audrina from ‘The Hills’ was partying as well. Then, as you must do in Vegas, we hit up the strippers, but it was just off putting and gross and the girls weren’t even that hot, so we jumped in a cab (who was determined to drop us at more strippers and "massage" places) and headed back to the Hotel where Cheads picked up a late night win of $200 on the pokies – Bastard!

The next day we went out for some Mexican.

Walked around some more, bought some Vegas paraphernalia, hit up the tables back at the Bellagio, and just as I was getting on a roll, I had to leave for the Airport for my flight back to Wilmington. The stopover was in Atlanta, and just so happened to be the same time a mate from Finland was also there and we were on the same flight back to Wilmington. Got back, had an hour of sleep then did an exam – results weren’t great – but I wouldn't trade that weekend in for anything. Thank you so much Cheadles!!

How to handle Vegas

How not to handle Vegas

  

SPRING BREAK - PCB!!!

On Friday the 9^th of March, spring break kicked off, and we were heading to Panama City Beach, Florida. We stopped off and had a night in Jacksonville on the way. It was a pretty sweet place, we arrived at our hotel, had some food at the bar – and we asked the bar bloke where we should go out that night. He informed us that “The clubs round here are pretty seedy. You’ll probably get jumped” . . . . Sweet…. We met a couple of girls also staying in the hotel, played some pool, had a chat, and we got a cab with them and headed into the main part of the city where we found a bar that had $10 entry – all you can drink. Perfect. The bar was the coolest place I have ever seen, it had actual trees in the club that went up into the roof, and they had planks of wood around them to put your drinks on. Big night!

The next day we made our way towards PCB, we were pumped, we were coming into the city, people were everywhere, we could see our hotel, and then . . . . the Gunt broke down 100 metres from The Holiday Inn!! Luckily it had only overheated, so we just had to wait a while and all was good. We were greeted by a security guard who asked us “Are you boys ready for this?” – we thought we were….. We got to our room, walked out onto the balcony and this is what we saw

Guys in the pool yelling at girls on balconies “SHOW YOUR TITS. SHOW YOUR TITS”, a simple yet effective chant which resulted in us seeing numerous amounts of mammary glands belonging to girls who's IQ's were probably similar to that of the temperature.

We were in a room next to a cool group of girls from New York, so the first night we opened the doors between our rooms and had a few drinks with them, we then headed down to the pool where we stayed the remainder of the night. The next day we came to the realisation that we were staying in THE hotel of PCB. Everything cool that happened on the beach, where all the tents and bikini contests happened, were right in front of our hotel, we had a DJ by the pool for about 18 hours a day, and people from all the other hotels trekked it along the beach to come to the area out the front of our place (a couple of girls we spoke to had walked for 2 hours from their hotel!! Suckers). Spring break was just as the movies had depicted – loose! And never before had we seen so many good looking, bikini clad women in all our lives. We thought a 10/10 was a mythical creature, PCB proved us wrong – but along with these amazing girls also came the largest amount of American douche bags we’d ever seen in our lives. We couldn’t understand how any of these guys ever got girls, yeah there was the occasional inquisitive good bloke who approached us and asked us where we were from and about the footy we were passing round and joined in, but for the most of it, they were just loud, obnoxious . . . wankers basically. That night, we had another pool party. Good times.

The next day we had beers on the beach, checked out the bikini contests – as you do on spring break, and that night a lot of pre drinking in the rooms with some cool chicks we’d met from Indiana, and then we headed out to a huge club called, Club LaVela

Check it out: http://clublavela.com/

Had a massive night there, with an awesome band that Nicko and I were rocking out to for ages, and then I ended up getting kicked out, not because I’d done anything wrong, but because I was quite happy tearing round by myself and having a good time whilst the other boys were ready to leave, so they asked the bouncer to kick me out. There’s a first for everything. 

The next day was painful to say the least, I had my hangover feed at 9pm, yes, pm. The boys came up from the pool a bit later to find me with a Soco and Coke in my hand trying to bring myself back from the dead and get ready to go out with them, but, soft I know, I couldn't make it out. But the good news to come about from that night is, Hully in his drunken state, booked us an extra night at the Hotel – Legend!!

The next day we had beers on the beach where Jimmy proceeded to ask “I’ve heard heaps of people saying PCB, what does it mean?” – Jimmy, that would be Panama City Beach mate, and you’re on it. That night much of the same antics.

Plank Shots

On the beach

Bossin

Our final full day we hired out jet skis. We managed to work it so that all five of us were able to tear around together, it was awesome fun, and definitely one of the highlights of the trip. In the state of Florida, if you are over 22 then you don’t require a boat licence – this meant that Jimmy, being the only 21 y.o. had to sit a test to get his boat licence. Luckily he passed with flying colours – all I can say is, lucky Nicko was 22. That night we stayed and had drinks in the pool, and this is where the adventures of Gnomio really kicked off (Gnomio is a gnome that Nath stole from his flatmate one drunken night who has been traveling with us everywhere we go – he even has a Facebook). We discovered that Gnomio made for a great mixing container for our drinks, so we filled him up, took him round the pool, got people to give him a kiss, and then said now taste the magic from his foot……

   

 

 

That night we had one final visit to waffle house for an early morning feed before we headed off.

So our waitress came to serve us, and Nath turned and said to her, "Before you get us any food, how do I get myself one of those hats" - and she returned with gifts! - We also decided to get new names, L-R Booner, Dinga, Basco and Perrins - who knows....

We set off from PCB at 9am after 2hrs sleep with sore bodies, lack of dignity, horrendous hangovers and unforgettable memories. We decided we just wanted to get home, so punched on through back to Wilmington which took about 12 hours – I drove for the first time - didn't crash, winning. We got home and died for the next couple of days.

Similar to the Inbetweeners movie I got us some singlets made up, unfortunately they arrived the day after we left for Spring Break so we didn't have them for that. But we made good use of them afterwards

Some random things from Spring Break

A plane in panama city dragging a banner: “like the beach, become a nurse” – right…..

Quote from Nicko “American blokes are fags because they don’t do their hair…..”

Jimmy hooked up with an Asian chick named William……. legit.

A chick in the servo had the name Johnie - also legit!

CAROLINA CUP

On the weekend of 31^st March I went with some American friends, and Matt, (another Aussie bloke who did exchange at UNCW and has been living/working in Wilmo for 3 years now) to The Carolina Cup. It is one of the biggest horse racing events in the US, not only that, but it is also an excuse for all Frat boys and Sorority Chicks to just get absolutely legless – majority of them don’t see a horse the entire day.

It was an eye opener to say the least

• Majority of the guys dressed like dickheads. Our mates were alright, but the others wore pastel coloured trousers, pastel coloured shirts, pastel coloured ties, topped off with a visor or backwards cap - magic.

Spot the Aussies

Trousers....

A photo I found online which gives a better idea

• in the state of South Carolina it is illegal to gamble (at least on horse racing) which was bollocks - Matt and I had a bet between us but always forgot to watch the race so that didn't really work out
• tailgating in fact means sitting at the back of your car cooking on a "grill" 

• met a chick from Darwin of all places
• my friend Allison wore a dress she had in yr5 and still pulled it off?!?

• The races were mainly steeplechase and the track had grass nearly a foot high!?

That night we went out for a friends 21^st. Over here when girls turn 21 their friends make them a list of 21 things they have to do that night (which they hang around their neck on a big piece of card). We found out the bars closed at 2 not 4 so Alex had just over 2 hrs to get everything done, and kudos to her, she nailed them all – including lap dancing a random bloke on the street who at one point said “don’t put your leg on my shoulder, I’m hungry”…. Another guy asked if it was her first 21^st...... And taking a shot out of a belly button - somehow I landed that one ha

Tequila Shots

EASTER BREAK – NASHVILLE AND ATLANTA

On the 4^th April we began our road trip to Nashville, Tennessee. I was particularly excited for this because it meant I was going to catch up with my great friend Keri whom I hadn’t seen since we lived together when she did exchange at Newy in Semester 1, 2010.

After nearly 12 hours of driving we finally arrived. Nashville was a much bigger and built up city than we had imagined. We went out that night to a small bar where the cover band sung Gotye (it is absolutely huge over here now), and Keri was able to pop in and say hi briefly before she had to go which was awesome. We went next door where a black guy with the deepest voice was singing, he was unreal.

      

We got a lift of some random blokes to get some food, where I had the hottest wings I have ever had, thanks to the boys geeing up the waitress to make them extra hot. I was literally crying whilst eating them, but was so hungry at the same time, catch twenty two. I somehow managed to finish them though but was not looking forward to my next trip to the toilet…..

The next day we went down town to have a look around. We went to the Hard Rock Café which had so much memorabilia, it was unreal.

Then we walked round and did the touristy shit. We went to go to the History of Music Hall/Museum, but refused to pay the ticket cost, so that was exciting…

Havin a singalong

    




That night we went out for dinner with Keri, her boyfriend and a couple of other mates, and then hit the town. The beers were enormous and the band played the best music, all old school, and they took any requests, even if they hadn’t sung the song before, such as, Men at Work, just to make sure everyone knew there were Aussies around. Whilst there I saw a girl I would rate around 100/10 – absolutely phenomenal – I didn’t talk to her though, I was playing hard to get…… Great night out – for most of us….. that’s a story for another time.

Me and Keri

Strapping young gents

Small beers

The next morning we woke up to a classic Collimore quote “I can’t keep living this rock lifestyle”

On the 7th we drove to Lynchberg, the home of Jack Daniels distillery. Our tour guide Dusty had the thickest southern/country accent we had ever heard – we were all struggling not to lose our shit when he first started speaking. He was actually distantly related to Jack himself. We all consider ourselves Whiskey connoisseurs as a result of the tour.  What was interesting however is the fact that Lynchberg is actually a dry county and the only place you can buy alcohol is from the shop at the distillery, but even then you can’t drink it!

Out the front of the distillery

Our boy Jack

After that we headed off not knowing where on earth we were going to next. We pulled up beside Maccas to use their free wifi and decided to head to Atlanta, so we booked some cheap accommodation in down town Atlanta. We all enjoyed the fact that none of us were worried about where we were off to next, whether we had to sleep in the van, and the fact we could go anywhere we wanted. Love road trips!

We arrived in Atlanta that evening, booked into the hotel an found flyers for $15 off admission to “Six Flags over Georgia” theme park – tomorrow we had a plan! We woke up early (for us) the next morning and got our fair dose of adrenalin rushes throughout the day. We had a great time both on the rollercoasters, and off, having a laugh at the people too fat to fit on the ride, and having an even bigger laugh at Nath ripping the back of his shorts which he had to deal with for the last couple of hours we were there.

Six Flags Over Georgia Theme Park

Superman!!

We got back into Atlanta, had a feed, and I began working on my assignment and presentation which was due at 2pm the next day. We had originally planned to leave around 4-5am so as to get back in time. But rather than all wake up exhausted, we set off at midnight before anyone had fallen asleep. So we'd already bumped into some interesting characters around Atlanta and that wasn't about to stop. We pulled into a servo to fuel up and before we got out of the car some random bloke stumbled over to our window and proceeded to tell us how he had been shot, how he had seen aliens from space, and a bunch of other random crap before asking us for money - needless to say, shitting ourselves, window went up and we drove off onto the next servo which was a bit better, but I had to get cash out and was using my Aussie card so withdrew $300 because of the fees, and there was another creepy bloke standing next to the machine who exclaimed "I aint never heard the machine make sound like that" as it was spitting out all my 20's - I grabbed them and ran back into the car. We finally fuelled up without being shot, mugged, raped etc. Nicko took the first leg of driving, while I sat in the passenger seat finishing my speech and five page report, and the rest of the van turned into a dorm, Jimmy sleeping on the back seat, Nath in the middle, and Hully on the floor. I basically finished my work, smashed a couple of red bulls at the next servo and took over the driving for the next couple of hours. I only just got us to a servo in time which luckily opened 10 minutes after we got there. Jimmy took the final leg and I crashed in the back seat, had a couple of hours sleep, did my speech, and I think my teacher just loved the accent, in my tired, uncomprehendable (is that a word?) state, I managed to get 75/75, and the same for my report - uni is so easy over here, it is ridiculous.

Oh and this was our list of meals over the Easter break – I’m surprised I (we) haven’t put on double the weight I’ve (we’ve) already put on

·      Maccas

·      Hottest chicken wings in the world (burgers for the others)

·      Hard Rock Café burgers

·      Pizza

·      Dirty Mexican

·      Chinese

·      Hot Dogs

·      Subway

·      Hungry Jacks

·      Horrible pizza

·      Theme park food

·      Pizza

·      All this + Jack, Beers and Shots = both a forgettable and unforgettable Easter break (and a suffering body)

We also travelled to some interesting places along the way, including:

·      Athens

·      Lebanon

·      Florence

·      Columbia

·      Shelbyville

REMAINING WEEKS 

Over the next coming weeks we just continued with the Wilmington parties, went to a few frat parties, actually met some great blokes, not the standard frat douches, and day by day we each became more miserable as the realisation that we had to leave Wilmington was ever becoming a reality.

My mate Eben (who advised me to go to Wilmington after going there last year) came back for a few days in March/April. Went out with him, great to catch up with a mate from home.

Anzac Day


The weekend after Anzac Day we were invited to this Aussie guys house to celebrate. Deano one of our mates who'd already been there a semester knew him, but a girl in my class (who babysat this guys kids) had also approached me to let all the Aussies know that we were welcome to head round. It was an amazing house, great people, lots of Aussies. We held a proper service, sung the national anthems and all. It was really well done. They also put on a lamb roast, vegemite sandwiches, lamingtons, pavlova, beers and Two Up!! The kids got so into it, and we all felt so bad taking money from them, until they won - and kept winning - little shits!

Teaching them early

Me and Noni

The Aussies (and Leon!)

Also nearing to the end of the semester we took to hitting up the beach almost every afternoon, one of which we swam with a dolphin about 5m away which was pretty cool.

It then came time to the final few days before leaving. One of the boys good mates Jelvin arrived in to begin travelling with them, we met him at the airport, me as the chauffeur.

Then all the on campus accommodation expired so I ended up having all the boys crashing at mine, needless to say it was a bit of a squeeze having 7 guys crammed into my room and the living room.

Random bits and pieces

Living! A friend of mine, Sarah, celebrated her 21st on a boat before heading into town

Out with a couple of the Frat guys

A friends beach house with a shit view

The 16^th of May finally came, that dreaded day where I signed off my lease and it was goodbye Wilmington. But, I couldn't be too sad, as I had some awesome adventures ahead of me. I think I’ll wrap it up there as you are probably extremely bored by now, and I also have to leave some stories for the next entry (which will come sooner than this one did I promise!!)

Other Random extras

You can steal from supermarkets. They have a no chase policy. The manager apparantly can. But they knock off at 7 so after that you are good to go?!?!!?

More stupid Girls names:

• Adrian
• William
• Jonnie
• Ryan
• Brady 
• Thats to add to:
• Stevie
• Cory
• Shaun
• Christian
• Linden
• Justice
• Hayden
• Barry

Stupid Questions asked by Americans

• Have you ever been on a plane?
• Do you have dogs in Australia?
• Do you have seasons?
• Do you have the same calendar?
• Do you have eletricity?
• Is there Facebook in Australia?
• Do you ride Kangaroos?
• Would Australia be safe if a tsunami hit? I mean it is an island right?! To which I informed her that this Island is nearly as big as the states
• Do you learn English at school?
• Why'd you go to Jamaica? You can do that when you're back home.

And one final note that gave me a giggle, the florist around the corner from me had a big sign
"Spring has sprung. We got so excited we wet our plants"

Hope you're all well. Be sure to check out my previous entries if you haven't read them already, they are funnier than this one!!

Stay classy